Saturday, May 18, 2013

Date a Girl Who Burps


Date a girl who burps. Date a girl who feels comfort in sharing stories of the time she seasoned Maggi noodles with chilli flakes and oregano leftover from a month old delivery of Domino’s pizza, on a night before her final exam. Date a girl who talks without caring for the purple of a kaala khatta chuski trickling down her chin. Date a girl who then walks down a busy Indian market with you, and jumps with joy on spotting a paan-wala selling chocolate paan.

I know you’d want to date a girl who reads; who looks lost in her book at Oxford Coffee Shop. She will discuss the characters from classics, and make you read pages from fiction that she finds really funny. But date her if she burps. Date her if she finds it funny to burp in front of you, and not embarrassed. Date her because she strips herself of all pretence when she’s with you. Date her because when discussing characters from books will become only a wonderful memory of the initial phase, she will be creating more wonderful memories with you, etching the lines of your identity to beautifully dance with hers on a transparent glass of her own character.

I know you’d want to date a girl who travels; who finds beauty in the different ways eyes gleam against the sun across various lands. She will be adventurous and have so many experiences to share. But date her if she burps. Date her if she burps after devouring a Lebanese meal, and then snorts while laughing about it immediately after, during your first weekend trip together. Date her because when her work won’t allow her to travel, she’ll find pleasure in travelling with you to the local fort on a Saturday evening, or in making her fingers traverse through your thinning hair while you sleep bare-chested in each other’s arms, feeling the comfort of letting go of all the cotton that conceals your true human image behind a carefully woven fabric to impress.

I know you’d want to date a girl who looks pretty; whose beauty your peers would want to call their own. She will get you the title of a player and raise your confidence to touch new standards. But date her if she burps. Date a girl if she burps during a kiss and then laughs at the way your eyebrows twitch immediately after. Date her because she will turn it into one of the many crazy romantic things you guys do, which you’ll be proud to know that other couples don’t share the comfort of doing. Date her because she’ll be your best friend, and there is no one prettier in the world than the person who you give that title to.

I know you’d want to date a girl who matches all the qualities on your list; who you think will be the answer to all your prayers for the perfect partner. She will understand you the way your limited perception believes she will. She will keep you enchanted in her love till ever after like your twenty years of inexperience tells you she will. But date her if she burps. Date her because this will not be a quality that you’ve put on your list. Date her because no matter how perfect a self-imagined character may appear in your thoughts, you may not feel any attraction to a high scorer on the test, but may fall head over heels for someone who fails terribly on the theoretical exam that you have set.

Date a girl who burps, who snorts, who farts, and who breathes. Date her because she is nothing of what you had thought your partner would be, but everything that a normal living girl can be. Date her because love is not something that you can limit in a checklist; it’s not something that you can choose at your will. It’s in abundance in the world around you, then why limit all that you can possibly receive?

Image Source: pajamaforest.com

49 comments:

  1. Loved it...it was worth 5 jalebis as after reading it I burped as much as I do after eating such number of jalebis

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    1. YOUR FIRST COMMENT ON MY BLOG! FINALLY! :P

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  2. OPEN a chain of halwai shops man!
    LOVED it!

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  3. Replies
    1. So I still have my thunder! Thank you :)

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  4. This is my favourite-est post by you till date. Shows what you're really capable of. :)

    P.s. As you can see, I've finally learnt how to comment here. And if I took the pain to figure that out, you should know how much I liked it. :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Raju. Very kind. All bloggers love comments :D

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  5. Replies
    1. Thanks, Kushal. Or it could also be Aarushi :P :D

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  6. (@) (@) (@) (@) (@)
    (@) being imartiis ...

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  7. when there is pretence, there is no love!
    Thumbs up!

    @@@@@ :)

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  8. @@@@@ & @@@@ :D Thats soo cute and sweet..
    Its ur first article am reading! I wish to read all in spare time! (y)

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    1. Thanks, Aey-Jay! I hope you find them equally engaging :D

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  9. Best part of this post: Last para :D

    In other words, date a girl who's normal :P Enjoyed reading this! :)

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    Replies
    1. Thank you, Ashna :D

      Yay, one of my favorite bloggers likes it :)

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  10. Just too cool! Now I'm thinking of adding a 'she should burp and fart unabashedly' clause in my matrimonial ad 6-7 years down the line :D

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    1. I just hope you're not Manglik. There are very few burpers and farters in the group.

      Oh, but you're sikh. Paaji thodi care karde aa ki kudi manglik hai ke nahi. Kudi chukko, Sunday chukko, te karo balle balle :D

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  11. Great piece of work man. You are very talented!

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  12. Beautiful :')
    Loved it. I am definitely opening you a Halwai Shop! :D

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    1. Thank you, Harmonica. So glad to know that you liked it :D

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  13. This is your bestestest blog till date :D

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  14. This was beyond beautiful. Something that would touch the heart of all those who are in love or want to experience the magical thing that love is. Shows how being normal can be so amazing.
    @@@@

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    1. Thanks :)

      P.S. You, anonymous, are on my facebook friend list >_>

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  15. Your article is amazing! i have this coworker we share the same office and we both flirt like mad! She has started burping like crazy. I laugh it off but my boss will be the one calling me into the office lol what i do for love...

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  16. Nice write up! liked that!
    I just hope I should not force myself into dating some random girl who burps in front of me...:P

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    Replies
    1. Thank you *burp*
      I'm not a girl, so I can all I want!

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    2. Hi.. very interesting write up.. indeed this was your first blog that I have read..looking forward for more interesting stuff .. cheers !!

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  17. You just made me feel prettier. ;)
    I'm in love with your blogs... already!!
    Dukaan khol hi lo ab toh.

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  18. You should write a book. Great work.

    I want to write too. I want to know, how much time did you spend writing this post? Does it come very naturally, effortlessly to you or can I have some hope for myself?
    Keep it up man.

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    1. Hi, Anon. You're far too kind. There's miles to go.

      To answer your question about the time it takes me to write a post: This one took me not over half an hour. However, there are some that I've held on to for two hours. On an average, I think I write a post in about an hour.

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  19. I don't usually read blogs but a friend of mine sent this link. Brilliantly written stuff! that kind of stuff, that you would read in the editorial section of papers...kudos!

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    1. The editorials write about issues concerning the nation. This is wayyy too flimsy. But I'm so happy to know that you liked it so much :)

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  20. I never could love a girl which NOT LIKES burping!

    Is NOT a joke

    Buuuurping greeting from Germany

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  21. So, do you have a girlfriend?

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If you had 5 Jalebis, how many would you give me for writing this post?

None = You don't deserve any >:O
@ = Soggy and stale! :(
@@ = Stale! :|
@@@ = I'll need a samosa to digest this with! :P
@@@@ = Sweet and Crisp! :)
@@@@@ = I'm opening you a Halwai Shop! :D